"This is the first triple-ruffle mushroom collar in Hampstead."

I pretty much do whatever NPR tells me to do. Thus, when David Edelstein gushed over. . . I mean reviewed the movie Bright Star on Fresh Air and All Things Considered's co-host Melissa Block gushed over. . . I mean interviewed director Jane Campion, I decided I was being told to go and pined over it until I talked a friend into going with me. Bonus! It is only rated PG so I felt especially compelled to go and support it. I used to be the first in line for every PG movie because I wanted to show Hollywood that there is a market for "clean" films and show my support, blah, blah, blah. I don't really feel that way anymore, since nowadays the only movies rated PG are (1) embarrassingly bad chick-flicks, (2) mind-numbing romantic comedies or, (3) an assortment of talking-animal animated movies with a lot of really silly and slightly crude slapstick humor. So when Hollywood presents a PG movie that actually has good acting, good writing, intellectual substance, and a refreshing lack of farting jokes, I'm there.

Enter, Bright Star. This movie is about the relationship between the sublime Romantic poet John Keats and a young woman named Fanny Brawne. I won't spend too much time on the plot, but it is essentially about their relationship. It is a love story, but it doesn't have the same slightly corny feel of so many love-focused period dramas. (Now that I think about it, is there another kind of period drama?) The writing is really lovely and the actors are just fabulous. I was especially taken with how beautiful the film was - just check out these images from the movie.

But keep in mind, I am an absolute sucker for visually beautiful films. If it is a beautiful film, I'll forgive a whole lot more than I normally would. (ONLY because I found the movie so stunning did I actually sit through The New World. If you're not familiar, it is basically a really, really long montage disguised as a movie - it felt like 27 hours - in which dialogue and plot don't so much take a backseat to design but really aren't even on the same freeway. From what I remember, the actors must have had a pretty good go of it 'cause I don't think any of them had more than 10 lines each. In 27 hours of film. I am pretty sure I had bedsores and a very glazed look by the time it was over, though it sure was nice to look at.) I don't know what that says about me as a person, so anyhooo. . . we'll just quickly move along and I'll share with you a few of my favorite things about Bright Star:

• Fanny Brawne designs and sews her own clothing, and she always looks just awesome - ruffles and pleats and stripes. My favorite? The red and brown striped number in the picture above. My second favorite (but only because it sparks such a great line) is a shiny, dark metallic-colored ball gown with an enormous ruffled collar. This prompted my favorite line of the whole movie, and possibly the best line I've ever heard in a period drama: "This is the first triple-ruffle mushroom collar in Hampstead." And that, folks, is something to be mighty proud of.


• Fanny's little sister, Toots, is absolutely adorable. I would have taken her home if I could have. She has red, curly hair and a slight lisp. Enough said. (Check out her picture in the images above.)


• The whole relationship between John and Fanny is very chaste and largely conducted in front of other people. The absence of the heaving-bosoms-and-ripped-bodices so often attached to period dramas is really quite nice. At one point Fanny and her family move into the other half of a duplex-type house where John is staying with a friend. They figure out that their bedrooms share a wall, and at different points in the film you see them move their beds up against the wall where they each (Fanny in particular) spend a lot of time staring at and pressing their hands against that wall. Now that I write that, this whole scenes starts sounding frighteningly like A Midsummer's Night Dream. There's that "The Wall" plot between Pyramus and Thisbe in Bottom's ridiculously funny play. You know the scene - "And Thou, O wall! O sweet, and lovely wall!" Trust me, Bright Star's version is sweet, not corny, and there is no badly affected iambic pentameter involved.

I'll admit, this film does occasionally get just a bit over-the-top in a few places (if only ever so slightly) and I wasn't totally crazy about the Wuthering Heights feel to the ending. That said, it is definitely a movie worth seeing. Go quickly! Before it leaves your local artsy-fartsy-films-only movie house and goes the way of DVD bargain bins!

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10/5/09: Last Saturday night I saw the movie again and learned that my title quote should, in fact, be: "This is the first frock in all of Hampstead with a triple ruffle mushroom collar." So sorry. Please don't sue me, Jane Campion.